I went to the weight loss surgery information seminar last night. I found it all very stressful. I had expected to feel elated to be getting this far, but I don't.
J couldn't come with me as some friends had come over to help him with his car, so I had to go on my own. When I got there I was the only person on her own and I just felt like crying. It was such a strange experience. So many big people all in the same place. I don't often feel ashamed about my weight or size, but I did there. The seminar room had 'normal' chairs and specially-built fat chairs.
The seminar was informative and frightening. Peter Small, the surgeon, was frank and matter of fact about the statistics. My chances of dying from the surgery are much less than dying from my fatness.
The dietician who spoke about the lifestyle and diet changes after surgery was also very frank and informative. Do I want to never be able to eat bread or red meat again? Red meat I could live without easily, but bread? My relationship with bread is a given part of my life. It'scomfort, basic, a joy.
I feel ridiculously emotional, even now.